It's the end of the world as we know it.
It's the end of the world as we know it.
It's the end of the world as we know it and I feel fine.
EDITOR'S NOTE - Judging by the stories in the news, I am firmly convinced we have reached the End of Days. Human beings are fucking idiots. We are doomed.
"Just hold still boy."
A woman looking through her boyfriend’s phone was shocked when she found a clip of him having sex with her Staffordshire bull terrier.
Wayne Bryson, from Louth, Lincolnshire, made no excuses when police arrested him after his girlfriend handed in the phone.
The 19-year-old pleaded guilty to a charge of performing an act of sexual penetration with a dog when he appeared at Skegness Magistrates’ Court last month.
Bryson was also caught with £10 worth of cannabis, which he said he had ‘bought wet and was drying out’, according to the Grimsby Telegraph.
The teenager will be sentenced on March 5, with the maximum he can receive being two years in jail.
He was given bail on the understanding he is not allowed to be alone with animals.
The 19-year-old said it was the first time he had ever had sex with a dog.
Woman Beats Her Mom With Vibrator
A New Mexico woman allegedly bashed her mother in the head with a vibrator during a confrontation late Sunday night that left the older woman bleeding profusely, police report.
Sheryl Claffy, 60, called cops to report that her daughter Cara, 35, “struck her on the head with a vibrator” and was attempting to flee from the Albuquerque home they share. The elder Claffy, bleeding from a head wound, pointed to a Ford truck and told cops her daughter was inside the vehicle.
While the car was only occupied by a male driver, an officer reported, “I did notice an electric vibrator on the passenger side floor of the vehicle,” according to a criminal complaint which does not further describe the vibrator reports The Smoking Gun.
Cara Claffy was subsequently apprehended upon exiting a nearby house. She told officers that while she had earlier argued with her mother, she did not assault her kin. In fact, Claffy claimed that her mother had emerged bleeding from a room in their home, and reported “that she had struck herself with a vibrator.”
Sheryl Claffy told cops that she was watching TV when “an argument sparked” with her daughter. Cara, she said, “grabbed an electric vibrator” and hit her over the head with the device. “Sheryl Claffy immediately felt blood streaming down her head at which time she fled the house to call for help,” an investigator noted.
Pictured in the above mug shot, Claffy was arrested for domestic violence and aggravated battery on a household member.
Brothers celebrate lottery win
by blowing up their house
Two brothers who were celebrating a $75,000 winning lottery ticket by purchasing marijuana and meth accidentally blew up their house on Friday, said Sgt. Bruce Watts of the Wichita Police Department.
The explosion sent one of the brothers – a 27-year-old – to the hospital, where he remains in serious but stable condition with second-degree burns on his hands, arms and chest.
The other brother was sent to jail, Watts said in the Wichita Eagle.
The brothers were in a house in the 100 block of North Nevada Court, near Douglas and West Street, about 7 p.m. Friday, Watts said. One of the brothers went to the kitchen to refuel the butane torches they planned to use to light their bongs. He emptied a couple of large cans of butane lighter fluid, leaking butane into the air.
“The butane vapor reached the pilot light in the furnace, and as you might expect, ka-boom,” Watts said.
The victim was wearing a lottery T-shirt during the explosion.
The victim’s girlfriend loaded him and some children into a car and took him to the Via Christi Hospital on St. Francis emergency room, where she dropped him off and left.
Officers went to the house with a warrant, where the other brother ran out, admitting he had marijuana and methamphetamine. He was arrested.
|Our "Fucking Idiots" Series|
After careful consideration your editor has decided that evolution has put itself in reverse. Every new generation is becoming more retarded. As proof I offer these other articles in our series.
Vagina gun pulled after dispute over space aliens
A Fake Penis & Sheep Sex
Genital Biting and Flatulent Demons
Penis Snatching & Nipple Tattoos
PUGS & VAGINAS
GAY DOGS & Naked Man Goes On Defecating Rampage
Vampires & Sex with human skeletons
Zombies & "I lost my phone up a cow's ass"
Zombies & Chinese restaurant drags a roadkill deer through dining room
Man assaults wife with ostrich egg & "Porta-Potty Peeper"
Naked man threatens to eat police officers & Texas Zombie eats family dog
Dead cat turned into helicopter & Woman arrested for ripping testicle out of scrotum
Police used McDonald's hamburgers to lure naked man off tower
Mayor says water turns you Gay & Children beat up their mother for throwing away their beer