"There is danger from all men. The only maxim of a free government ought to be to trust no man living with
power to endanger the public liberty." - - - - John Adams

Sunday, December 9, 2012

Sunday Comics - Grandpa Simpson Quotes

Marge: "There are only 49 stars on that flag."

"I'll be deep in the cold, cold ground before I recognize Missoura!"

Bart: "Didn't you wonder why you were getting checks for doing
absolutely nothing?"

Grampa: "I figured because the Democrats were in power again."


Grampa:  "Big deal! When I was a pup, we got spanked by Presidents till the cows came home. Grover Cleveland spanked me on two nonconsecutive occasions."


Grampa: "Dear Mr. President, there are too many states nowadays. Please eliminate three. I am not a crackpot."

Grampa: "Thank you for this award. It is a tribute to this great country that a man who once took a shot at Teddy Roosevelt could win back your trust."

Grampa:  "I haven't felt this relaxed and carefree since I was watch commander at Pearl Harbor."

Grandpa Simpson

Grampa:  "The metric system is the tool of the devil! My car gets forty rods to the hogshead, and that's the way I likes it!"


Grampa: "Hot diggety! I'm gonna smooch her like a mule eating an apple! I even bought me some special novelty dentures. See?"


Grampa: "I was the one that canceled 'Star Trek'!"


Teenage Homer:  "You wouldn't understand, Dad, you're not with it!"

Grandpa:  " I used to be with IT but then they changed what IT was. Now what I'm with isn't IT, and what's IT seems scary and weird. It'll happen to YOU!"


Lisa: "Oh, Grampa! You're not busy, are you?"

Grampa: "Well, you're really asking two questions there. The first one takes me back to 1934. Admiral Byrd had just reached the pole, only hours ahead of the Three Stooges ... and I guess he won the argument, but I walked away with the turnips. The following morning, I resigned my commission in the Coast Guard. The next thing I heard, there was civil war in Spain ... and, that's everything that happened in my life right up to the time I got this phone call."

Grandpa:  "Ooh, I feel all funny - Ahh I'm in love! No, wait, it's a stroke."


Grampa:  "Grass today is sharper than when I was a boy"


Grampa to juvenile Homer: "Son, I'm not going to lie to you. You're dumb as a mule and twice as ugly. If a strange man offers you a ride I say take it."


Marge: "Grandpa, you've lived an interesting life...."

Grandpa: "THAT'S A LIE AND YOU KNOW IT! But I have watched a lot of movies...."


Grampa:  "I'm full of piss and vinegar! At first I was just full of vinegar."



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